Three Things to Remember When Building a Home
With one big swing and the snap of leather, the Boston Red Sox were world champions. Bars erupted across New England. Fans rushed the streets of Boston to celebrate deep into the crisp October night and over 2,500 miles away I sat and watch, on a couch, alone. Memories of the last time the Red Sox won the series rushed to mind. The chants, the crowds, surrounded by friends, home. The contrast hit me as the silence of the streets outside my house seemed to echo into the unconcerned desert stars.
Moving across the country is a hell of an adventure with the promise of new experiences and a fresh start but the flipside of this endeavor is in order to go anywhere we have to first leave somewhere and if it's your first move, this often means leaving the first place you called "home."
Home is an interesting word. For most, it conjures up memories of a specific location. We remember a house or a neighborhood or maybe even whole towns. Home has become geo-specific, exclusive to the idea of original residence. This is limited thinking and only really tees you up for the blues down the way if you ever do decide to explore beyond the borders of your upbringing. Instead, the reality is home truly is where you're heart is.
For those who just rolled their eyes, it's true. Home is where you live, not exist but live. Your childhood home is only home because it's rich in memories, good and bad, curated by people you love, experiences shared. There's no limit to these experiences so why limit your scope of home? The people I love are all over this country, east coast, west coast, the mountains, this crazy place called Florida etc. and some people may think its a negative being so spread apart but the truth is I'm one of luckiest people out there. I'd need more than my fingers and toes to count the people I love and who love me and as a result, my home is huge. It stretches from coast to coast and I bring it all on the road when I dive into the world beyond. They're the ones who inspire me to live, not exist, but to live, so whenever I'm somewhere, experiencing it fully, I'm home.
So if you're also on the edge of your own next great adventure and looking to make a move, here are three tips to help you experience the journey and continue to build your own home:
Find Your Tribe
You're in a new place looking to make new friends. The best place to find your old friends you've haven't met yet is looking for opportunities to meet people with a common interest. For me, it was seeking out a CrossFit gym. I like to workout daily and its a lifestyle I identify with so it was a priority to explore gyms around me to find the right fit. I tried maybe six and eventually found an incredible space with some amazing people. Also, be clear about what you're looking for. I made a comment about what I wanted in the perfect gym to some friends and we all laughed thinking this dream concoction was impossible. You can bet, with enough looking, I found my unicorn.
Learn Something New
The magic of moving somewhere new kind of gets lost if you're immediately jumping back into old routines. You've got a fresh start, you're new, no one knows you and you're in the perfect headspace, soaking everything in, to be daring. Try something new. Ever since a shoulder dislocation from sparring I've dabbled in the world of yoga. Then I led a trip to Costa Rica for VoyEdge RX and went full yogi for a week. It was amazing but I could never find a way to establish a regular practice once I got back. Then this move came up and I ended up in the yoga capital of the southwest. I reached out to the local yoga community to get some recommendations and almost immediately found myself upside down in knots, laughing and making connections with an entirely new community. So think about what's one thing you've always wanted to do or try and get after it! Go, fail, have fun. It's been one of the best decisions I've made in this whole process.
There's going to be a lot of new thrown your way the first few weeks and months. Carve out some time to relax regularly and allow yourself to decompress. Check out local bars and coffee shops. Slow down a bit. Get outside often, and breath in the local definition of fresh air. Find time to just be with your thoughts and check in on how you're feeling, what you're excited about and how you can navigate what's causing you anxiety. Treat it like a timeout. Celebrate your wins, recover, and gameplan. Being in a top 15 outdoor enthusiast city as ranked by National Geographic this one comes easily but in the words of the oft-cited philosopher F. Bueller "life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it."
Take it or leave it, the thing to remember the whole time is while building your home never neglect to reinforce the foundation. Despite the distance, bring your whole home along for the journey with you. Include them in the process. Just because their far away doesn't mean you're done making memories together because that's what defined home in the first place, right? Memories, experiences, love. So get out there and start building.